The Enigm@ Chronicles

Please select from the following options menu:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on
the
line so we can trace your call.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn’t matter which number you press,
nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before
the
beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term
memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.